I Hate My Blog!

It happens every Tuesday.

I get halfway through the day and I’m like “Great Caesar’s Ghost! I was supposed to post something today.”

I’ve had a blog for something in the neighborhood of 2 years, but only really got serious about it at the end of last year. Had some success with a few posts that people liked and even got to guest write on a few other blogs.

But suddenly the neat ideas I had are coming at a much slower pace.

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Seems I like I keep reading cool posts like “5 Exciting Characters Every Good Suspense Novel Needs!”, meanwhile I’m working on a piece like “What it’s really like being a Christian and a Star Wars Fan.”, recycling ideas from other posts.

I have having to force myself to write something just to get it done. I’ve had to do that with the book I’m working on. Just getting something on the page. It’s just something you need to do. But the only people who see that are my critique partners and a few others. Then I have months to work on it and get it ‘perfect’ before anyone else sees it. But posting on my blog is like sending out a half formed, typo ridden first draft where anyone anywhere can see it.

I have a talent for people’s negative reaction’s to my stuff. Seriously, it should be some kind of marketable skill. Every time I press send, I hear the critical voices saying “Lame! Boring! Your Joss Whedon jokes aren’t funny!”

Or worse, I just imagining people scrolling past my stuff on their news feed as they go to check out a hilarious meme about goats.

I like the comfortable feeling I get when I know I’ve something really good. I hate stepping out, not knowing what kind of feedback I will get, if any.

100_7244And that is the risk that we all take every time we put pen to paper and use words to bare our soul. There’s always the chance of putting out a stinker or that you’ll get the perfect ending to a short story and readers will sit and go “I don’t get it.”

We take that risk because without it there’s no thrill when people leave excited replies in the comment section or when your friends come up to you saying “Hey man, read your story. Great stuff.”

There’s the sense of accomplishment from knowing that your God given gift of writing is not going unused.

So I’ll keep writing and blogging and we’ll see what comes of it. Maybe it’ll get easier the more I do it. We’ll see.

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